Mommy woke up Sunday to the sound of Daddy’s cuppa tea chant. Daddy got up with me early so Mommy could sleep in, but after 9:00 a.m. he needed his cuppa. Tea tastes soooooooooo much better when someone else makes it for you.
There was only one teabag left in our tea container (shock, horror!), but crafty Mommy anticipated us running out and reached into the cupboard to get a brand spanking new box of PG Tips.
As Daddy was savoring his cuppa and reveling in his Englishness, I cut out the entry form on the back of the PG box and filled it out. Ok, so I guessed about the number of seats at the new Wembley Stadium. Surely they won’t hold that against me. If I win we’ll all get free tea for life!
technorati tags: PG Tips, tea, cuppa, teabag, English, Wembley Stadium
When Daddy leaves work in the evening, he often calls home and asks me if there’s anything I want at the shops. That’s a signal he’s going to buy lots of beer, and I sometimes ask him to buy Mommy some plain M&Ms if I’ve been terrorizing her all day.
Daddy is always happy to buy Mommy M&Ms, because that means he can buy himself choccy and THEN sponge off Mommy’s sweeties a day later.
Mommy always eats her M&Ms by a strict regimen. On the first day she’ll eat the red and yellow ones because they’re fruity flavored.
On the second day, Daddy hovers over her like a vulture because she’ll eat the blue and green M&Ms. It’s a well known fact the blue ones taste of laytex paint and the green ones taste of bogies, so they aren’t the nicest. Predictable Daddy sticks his lower lip out and proclaims he hasn’t had any choccy for an entire day, so Mommy will flick a few bogie-flavored ones his way.
The final day is designated for the brown M&Ms, which are by far the most chocolatey. Daddy doesn’t even try to pout because Mommy will refuse eye contact as she polishes off her remaining sweeties.
Who ever thought eating sweeties could be so complicated?
technorati tags: daddy, beer, candy, chocolate
Me and my folks travelled up to the IKEA in Croydon last weekend. For some reason Mom really doesn’t like Croydon, and often refers to it as Satan’s Armpit.
We originally made the trip to go find a cheap medicine cabinet, but it wasn’t meant to be. Eventually we found a cabinet called Baren, but silly Mommy forgot to write down the weird Swedish name for the shelves that matched the cabinet. For a while we all tried to guess what the shelves would be called: shelfblarg, kontainerholderr, tampoonhyderr…. to no avail.
While we were schlepping through the kiddie section, Daddy spotted a huuuuuge kontainer of stuffed rat toys and decided to get me one. You see, Mommy doesn’t like rodents of any type, and he explained to me that my future toy will actually help Mommy to not dislike rats as much.
When we started to head back towards our kaar, Daddy informed Mommy of my new rat toy and his reasoning for buying it. Mommy agreed, and said that night she’ll put her foot up Daddy’s backside and force him to go to the emergency room because he hasn’t visited a doktor since 1987, thus forcing him to face his fear.
What are some of your fears?
technorati tags: IKEA, Croydon, England, Swedish, rat, toy, doctor
After careful deliberation, and because I’m now chubby enough, I have a new car seat. Isn’t it fantastic?
I have to say, this facing forward business is top notch. My new seat sits me up high enough where gazing out at the chavs and pikeys is soooo much easier than before.
When my Mommy was little she didn’t have a car seat. When her parents picked her up from school, she sat on my Granny’s lap as they drove home. If she was screaming hungry, her Daddy would open the car’s sunroof, make her stand on his shoulders so her head was pushed out of the car’s roof AND MADE HER EAT AIRBORNE BUGS FOR DINNER. 
technorati tags: chubby, carseat, car seat, car, riding